The Itch, The Scratch, and The Body

How come anti-itch cream never seems to work when we need it to? It must be because we're always focused on the itch and it going away. Once we focus on it, the mind takes over the body, and the itch sometimes even feels worse. We've never learned to just leave the itch alone so it can just pass and go away.

Last week I miraculously contracted shingles. I say miraculously because shingles mostly occurs in people over 50 years old, or with a suppressed immune system, or mucho stress-o, or all three. I'm a laid back, 22 year old recent college graduate who has gotten the flu once in ten years without ever getting a flu shot in those 10 years. Hard to see where I fit in.

For those of you who don't know what shingles is, read Wikipedia. I'm not a professor. But I do know that it causes some itching. Interesting how the majority of the itching I feel is not associated with the large rash on my back, but the small set to the left of my belly button. It's really quite annoying. I wish I could trade back the itching to feel the pain I had earlier, because I could at least pop some Aleve to help with that.

You're probably wondering where this is all going, so let me assure you that there is one badass politically colored metaphor coming. My views on metaphors are mostly expressed in this article I wrote on LJ a couple years back, but even I didn't expect the upcoming one to work so well when I first thought of it:

The Gay Community (& Friends) is The Itch "Itchy"

The Anti-Gay Community is The Scratch "Scratchy"

So we're clear, I am not saying anything specific about what's wrong or right, or who should win, or anything of that nature. People who know me know what I think about it. I'm merely using this topic as a surprisingly fitting piece in my Itch analogy. I like how it fits. Also, I hope I don't get sued by Matt Groening.

So assume that everything is all hunky-dory at the beginning. But then, the body, America, contracts shingles. Nerve inflammation with a lot of pain on one side, a large rash on the back, and one small spot on the front that itches like hell. Always something wrong in America, but we're focusing on this itch, because we can see it in front of us and see that it is not just going to go away. We know that if we leave Itchy alone, it will eventually resolve itself and everyone is happy (read: Gays get rights, Anti-Gays deal with it until eventual harmony; Not Gays go away and never come back). But Itchy doesn't control the body, Scratchy does (at least one of the arms anyway), and Scratchy thinks that by just scratching the itch, Itchy will go away. For some reason, he hasn't figured out that this isn't true.

Scratching the itch only makes Itchy mad. Itchy starts to bring in its Friends, and the itch becomes worse as a result. As the itch gets worse, the body America gets distracted from the excruciating pain (Economy/Recession) and the large rash on the back (hm... let's say Iraq War) and starts focusing more on this itch that never should have been (read: Gay marriage should not even be an issue). It starts applying anti-itch creams (Propositions/State Laws) to where it is bothered, and while it works to some degree (CT, VT, MA etc.) it won't stop and only seems to get worse (CA).

I wish I could trade back the itching to feel the pain I had earlier, because I could at least pop some Aleve to help with that.

So I wish America would stop trying to deal with Itchy, because really it's just a matter of time before the itch is resolved and it can live with the body unperturbed again. Anti-itch creams may help, but because it draws attention to it, you're too focused on it to worry about the bigger problems in your body, which you can do something about (Aleve) and should be worried about more (because of the PAIN). Unfortunately for America, Scratchy exists, and will keep scratching and hoping for Itchy to go away. Itchy ain't going away as long as you keep scratching, folks.